Not because nothing happened,
Not because it did not hurt,
But because I came to understand it was never one person's fault. It was a collective fault.
A cultural problem. A collective silence.
I want change. Because change is inevitable, if we are to evolve.
You don't know anything about shame, do you?
You don't know what it means to change yourself, to survive. To walk a certain way.
To talk a certain way.
To lower your voice.
To dress down.
To make yourself smaller.
To drink, to stop feeling judged.
To constantly listen to loud music, to not hear people insulting you. I had to disappear.
I had to physically suppress who I am, to survive mentally.
Our differences are our greatest strength.
Without mine, I could not see the world the way I do.
I would not be myself without them.
What makes us, is what sets us apart.
Through your exclusion, I learned acceptance.
Let us accept our differences. Let us embrace them. Let us learn from them.
I only wanted to live, to be myself, but you hurt me, again and again.
You wanted me normal. You wanted me obedient.
You forced me to make myself smaller, until there was nothing left to hate.
So I left, to be myself.
Now you see me here, proud and strong.
But remember, I am only a visitor now.
I leave whenever I want. I no longer have to obey to your degrading unwritten rules. I want everyone to be whoever they are, without ever having to leave or change. If I had stayed, I doubt I would have found the courage to become who I am today. In love, and in tears of remembrance, for everything I became, my-true-self. Because there is nothing more righteous than being your true self, every day. This is not about me. This is about everyone, who thinks, who behaves, who acts, who speaks, differently. I want everyone accepted. Not merely tolerated. Accepted. Everyone, the deviants, the sodomites, the perverts, the sluts, the weirdos, the divas, everyone.
Except those who would deny others that same right. That is not a contradiction. That is the line where acceptance protects itself.
Born and raised here, forced to leave, to become my-true-self.